[Jules]

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I have family spread out all over the place, and there’s an expectation that I’m going to use precious time and money to visit, but there are places I want to go, too. They don’t travel because this one’s too old and this one has a baby and so on, which I understand, but I also find it frustrating that my travel budget is getting eaten up by these trips.

Is anyone else in this situation? What are your tips for balancing it?

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[Quruli]

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I’m in a similar spot. My mother finds travel exhausting at her age, and my siblings and I each have really limited vacation time.

Last year, my partner came with me to visit my mom, and we tried a family + personal itinerary. What helped was that we booked a hotel near her so that she wouldn’t feel she had clean her place for us. We came by in the mornings to pick her up for low pressure outings, like visiting a local winery, taking scenic drives, and trying out restaurants.

[Far and Away]

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I can relate, Jules, and it’s a tough spot to be in.  Can you temper your disappointment by taking one trip of your choosing every so many years?  Your family should appreciate that you usually put them first.  Surely it’s okay to do as you please every now and then.

I try to make required trips more pleasant by sightseeing along the way and taking a day or two to tour somewhere on along the same route.

[Jules]

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Thanks for the input! These are good suggestions, and I’ll do my best to implement them when I’m visiting family later this year. I think the biggest snag is to get over my frustration with putting my travel plans on hold.

Something I did decide to do that I’m hoping will help is combine it all into one big trip. So, instead of going to one destination and coming home, then going to another one and coming home and so on, I’ll be flying to Florida and, from there, going to Louisiana, Texas, and Minnesota. It’ll take about two weeks to cover everything, but I think it’ll be worth it.

[Author]

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